school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Randomize
