so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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