i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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