she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
