You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
It's blow job season.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
