So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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