im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize