I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
The Olympian is in my bed
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
