He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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