Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
