we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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