Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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