i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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