Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
