Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
