She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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