The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
