break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize
