O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
