i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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