that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
