So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
