Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
