my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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