HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
well most of my day revolves around power hour
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize