im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
