Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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