I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize