I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize