I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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