i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
