she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
