i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
