It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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