How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
