oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
