You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
im six kinds of drunk right now
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
