Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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