Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
