Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Randomize