Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Randomize
