I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
operation harelip BJ is a go
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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