i just wanna soil my oats bro
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize