So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize