Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
We got so high we made milksteak
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
