Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
meet me or not, i'm out of control
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
