You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize
