He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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