did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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