i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i was born a porn star she said
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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