If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
