this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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