He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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